Do Not Try This At Home

Y'all.

If you ever find yourself awake at 5:00 in the morning because your back is hurting and you think to yourself, "My child will be awake in about an hour. I should take some Advil now so that it has time to work before I go on duty."

For the love of Pete, PUT YOUR GLASSES ON FIRST!

Otherwise you will take two Tylenol PMs at 5:00 in the morning and three hours later find yourself laying on the floor having cars driven all over you because that is the closest to "playing" you can get.

Ask me how I know this. Go on, ask me.

(Almost) Wordless Wednesday

Happy 60th Birthday Granddaddy! We love you "Big Much!"



Grasshopper is wearing my mother's Minnie Mouse Santa ears. Do my parents know how to party or what?

Adoption Day

Dear Grasshopper,

You have just reached the age where super heroes fascinate you. You imagine yourself with magical powers, soaring through the air while your cape streams behind you on your way to vanquish the bad guys.

What you don't realize is that you already are a super hero. You have extraordinary powers, little one.

On this day 3 years ago, you made me a mother. On this day three years ago, you made my husband a father. Three years ago today, you and your magic powers transformed us from a couple burdened by infertility and heartache into a FAMILY.

There is no greater power in the world than the power of love, and you have that power in spades.

We hit the jackpot the day we found each other, Darling Boy. I will be forever grateful to you and your super powers for vanquishing our bad guys and making our dreams come true.

Your Mommy always and forever,

Natasha

Make a Smilebox slideshow

More Conversations with Grasshopper (You Can't Make This Stuff Up)

JR: "Hey buddy, where did all of your fish sticks go?"

Grasshopper: "Dem in my tummy!"

Me: "All of them?"

Grasshopper: "Yep!"

JR: "Is there a party in your tummy?"

Grasshopper: "Yes! A Tummy Party!"

Me: "Well, what about your strawberries? They want to go to the party too!"

Grasshopper: "Whoopsie!"

[Begins cramming strawberry chunks into his mouth. Chews. Goes back for more until they're gone too.]

Grasshopper: "Now da strawberries are at my Tummy Party!"

JR: "I bet they're having fun!"

Grasshopper: "They are going to have cupcakes and a pinata at the Tummy Party!"

Me: "Oh, really?"

[Struggles not to laugh.]

Grasshopper: "And da Monkey Boy* is there!"

Me: "The Monkey Boy is in your tummy?"

Grasshopper: "Yep! I eat him!"

JR: "You ate The Monkey Boy?"

[Grins widely and nods his head enthusiastically while patting his tummy.]

Me: "That is so silly!"

Grasshopper: "No Mommy, dat's NAUGHTY!"




* The Monkey Boy is Grasshopper's best bud.

(Almost) Wordless Wednesday 3rd Birthday Edition

Grasshopper and The Monkey Boy had a fabulous beach party for their birthday. We had enough partiers that I made 60-something cupcakes and only had a dozen left at the end of the day!

Here are some images of the day in no particular order since I'm running behind.

Enjoy!

In which I answer the siren song of The Mouse

I cannot believe that I'm saying this, but...we're going to Disney World!

Early this fall, just in time for my birthday.

JR and I hemmed and hawed about spending the money (what with trying to afford another adoption and the state of the economy and all that) but the bottom line is this: we HAVE to go to Orlando.

My father's parents reside in an assisted living facility there, and we have real doubts as to how much longer my grandmother will be with us, and how much longer my grandfather (who has Alzheimer's) will recognize us. Therefore, a trip to Orlando must be made, and if we're going to make the trip, we might as well do it right!

Also, I have some guilt (a shocking thing in a mother, right?) about the opportunities for Grasshopper that we have turned down because we are saving for a sibling. I couldn't stand the idea of not giving him this treat solely because we want another child.

So, a journey to The Mouse it is.

We have made our reservations at a Disney Resort, contacted my godparents and JR's sister who also live in Orlando so that we can see them during our stay and are now mapping out our itinerary.

That's where all of you come in, Dear Internets!

Please give me your tips and tricks for navigating the Land of the Mouse and making this vacation as fun and memorable as possible for every member of our family. We are Disney novices (JR and I have been, of course, but it has been years and we never had a three year old to manage) and therefore can use all of the advice you have to offer.

Thanks!

Oops, my bad...

So. Um, Hi! [waves weakly]

I totally up and disappeared, didn't I?

Sorry about that.

I meant to write a post about how my parents are the best grandparents EVER because they let us drop Grasshopper off with them for almost a week while JR and I had our first ever post-parenthood vacation (okay, it was really a staycation) together.

But then I didn't.

Because my husband is the best husband EVER. And he puts up with my blogging, and my Tweeting, and my commenting and just generally seeing only the back of my head while I stand at the kitchen counter and play with the laptop. Almost every day.

So when we had the opportunity to connect as a couple (so corny, right?) and to really focus on each other, I took it. I turned the laptop off and *mostly* stayed away from it all week.

So if you've been wondering, "What happened to Natasha? Why hasn't she been leaving me truly insightful and witty comments?" [that's totally how you think of me, right?]

Here's your answer: I was giving them to my husband. And when I'm getting a full night's sleep and not being constantly distracted by the wants and whims of a small boy, it turns out that I really can be truly insightful and witty. Who knew? [Well, I guess the pre-parenthood me and the pre-parenthood JR did, but we haven't seen those people in a really.long.time.]

JR and I had a fantastic time just talking to each other this week. About stuff! And things! Stuff and things that do not relate to small boys in any way! It was marvelous. I live with a really interesting guy, y'all (when I remember to get to know him). We also ate at a bunch of restaurants that do NOT have kids menus, shopped at the Farmer's Market and grilled out, hiked along the Chattahoochee river, and hung out with some childless friends. It was great.

Grasshopper had numerous adventures with his grandparents, and when we finally got home with him late on Friday afternoon he announced that, "I like Unci & Granddaddy's house better."

I took that to mean that he had a lot of fun. And didn't have quite as many rules to follow. Ahem.

But now he is back, and I have been really staggered by how happy I am to have him here at home. While he was gone and I was busy being reminded of exactly why I married JR 6.5 years ago (hint: he is awesome), I missed him. But not that much.

Now that he is home I can't keep my hands off of him. I am picking that boy up just to hold him against me and feel him breathe like I would when he was a baby. I give him kisses until he squirms away laughing, "Stop it! Mommy!" I'm sneaking into his room just to watch him sleep, something I haven't done in months.

My love for him grew more visceral and palpable during his absence, which I hadn't really anticipated. But which I find myself very grateful for. I expected to find that original spark that drew JR and I together 8 years ago (and I'm so pleased that I did) but I didn't expect to fall in love with my child again too.

That was a really special bonus.